Wednesday, 14 August 2019

The Unfinished Woman

I often think that we can never get where we want to go, never achieve what we truly want to achieve. There are so many ideas and visions in our brain however we will never attain most of them.

Those we see who have achieved so much are probably thinking that they have achieved so little unless they are the type that think themselves very accomplished however I do not think in the heart of hearts many think this. There is always  more and yet and yet... we squander our precious time with useless things and musings that get us nowhere. We fear more than we dare, we caution more than we venture out. The world is wide but it is scary. So we live in our own little heads and make grand plans and dreams and then pretend that they can be lived out for real but usually they are just a dream that never sees light of day.

So we remain unfinished within ourselves, the question is Do we surrender to our unfinished state having obtained an age where further success and achievement seems unlikely OR do we keep plodding on making  the most of each living/waking minute?

The fact that many of realise oh too late or perhaps in the deepest recesses of our mind we already knew it so but were unable to fully admit to it, that we age too fast, life is too short and our mortal coil is too ready to leave us.

Our skin turns thin, our faces sag, we have aches that we never had before and no longer exert ourselves for fear of misplacing a part and not being about to return it to position. We slow, we age and we think where is the life we once had? And all before the age of fifty! What happens after that I am yet to find out though I perceive those over this age are not as sprite as will between the ages of youth and old age. Old age gets us all though some may age more gracefully, none of us are immune to its trespasses.

So we find ourselves still alive and yet our lives unworthy of our own thinking and judgments. Do we live in bitter angst that had so and so not done so and so we would have achieved great things or do we pull ourselves up and say the time is NOW! The time is always now however we trick ourselves into believing that it is 5 minutes away or tomorrow or next week or next year or never… No not never but our lives are so finite. Even the good christian I want to be rebels at the concept of never ending time, where is the challenge in that? If everything is perfect do we rob ourselves of the challenge? We must be brazen and bold. We must risk our honour and reputation to make a mark in a world that does not want our accomplishments or at least does not care. Do we owe the world our unspun gifts or should we relinquish our dreams? We must press on in the dark, we must keep going and keep the knowledge that what has been dreamed may be possible Sometimes we deny ourselves the opportunity lest we appear to grandious, why we might even be good at something but better to hide than to be criticised and perhaps lose heart. The crucible of life is forever burning, our hearts forever yearning, do we settle for false peace for what we see or do we press on to what we could be?

Blessings to you all and may you achieve all your amazing dreams!

Sophie Knox

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