Wednesday, 14 August 2019

The Unfinished Woman

I often think that we can never get where we want to go, never achieve what we truly want to achieve. There are so many ideas and visions in our brain however we will never attain most of them.

Those we see who have achieved so much are probably thinking that they have achieved so little unless they are the type that think themselves very accomplished however I do not think in the heart of hearts many think this. There is always  more and yet and yet... we squander our precious time with useless things and musings that get us nowhere. We fear more than we dare, we caution more than we venture out. The world is wide but it is scary. So we live in our own little heads and make grand plans and dreams and then pretend that they can be lived out for real but usually they are just a dream that never sees light of day.

So we remain unfinished within ourselves, the question is Do we surrender to our unfinished state having obtained an age where further success and achievement seems unlikely OR do we keep plodding on making  the most of each living/waking minute?

The fact that many of realise oh too late or perhaps in the deepest recesses of our mind we already knew it so but were unable to fully admit to it, that we age too fast, life is too short and our mortal coil is too ready to leave us.

Our skin turns thin, our faces sag, we have aches that we never had before and no longer exert ourselves for fear of misplacing a part and not being about to return it to position. We slow, we age and we think where is the life we once had? And all before the age of fifty! What happens after that I am yet to find out though I perceive those over this age are not as sprite as will between the ages of youth and old age. Old age gets us all though some may age more gracefully, none of us are immune to its trespasses.

So we find ourselves still alive and yet our lives unworthy of our own thinking and judgments. Do we live in bitter angst that had so and so not done so and so we would have achieved great things or do we pull ourselves up and say the time is NOW! The time is always now however we trick ourselves into believing that it is 5 minutes away or tomorrow or next week or next year or never… No not never but our lives are so finite. Even the good christian I want to be rebels at the concept of never ending time, where is the challenge in that? If everything is perfect do we rob ourselves of the challenge? We must be brazen and bold. We must risk our honour and reputation to make a mark in a world that does not want our accomplishments or at least does not care. Do we owe the world our unspun gifts or should we relinquish our dreams? We must press on in the dark, we must keep going and keep the knowledge that what has been dreamed may be possible Sometimes we deny ourselves the opportunity lest we appear to grandious, why we might even be good at something but better to hide than to be criticised and perhaps lose heart. The crucible of life is forever burning, our hearts forever yearning, do we settle for false peace for what we see or do we press on to what we could be?

Blessings to you all and may you achieve all your amazing dreams!

Sophie Knox

Monday, 27 June 2016

How to be disillusioned

There is nothing as painful as realising that what you thought was true and taken for granted is simply not so. To have the rug pulled out from under you so to speak. Learning about ourselves and others can be a truly painful process. The modern way is tolerance of all things, avoiding offence of anyone. No one can speak their mind without the risk of being called into line for hate speech or being intolerant. Well, why can't I say how I do not understand how things can be so. How things are not logical. I just have to pretend that it is all okay and that nothing of consequence is happening.

It is interesting to look back through history and see how people's views on morality and justice have changed. It is interesting to note that in every time period people thought they were the most enlightened and yet when we look back on the current day as it falls into history will we think the same? The wording and context of evils changes so as to obscure what is truly happening. Take abortion for example. In another time and another culture children were ritually sacrificed to pagan gods. Would we think that is a good idea now? Would we reel in horror? I think these days we are very visual with media and internet at our disposal. The thing is I can imagine this ritual sacrifice happened every day and people kind of ignored it because it happened many miles from where they were living and didn't affect their community at that particular time. People often have short memories of things far away. I suppose then when it did come to their village they would use euphemisms to justify the sacrifice as 'I'm sure we'll see a good new Spring crop' People just saw children as something like things that are grown and can be discarded. An individual life had no special significance. It would be easy for us to think like this again if the culture was steered this way. So what do we do today? Well in America half a million babies are murdered every year with no legal consequence. Because it is done before birth, before they are legally human. Most people are easily swayed by trusting on their dominant culture and people in special positions of influence. It is difficult to go against the ongoing tide. We need to be modern and up to date otherwise we are of little value or worth. Well this is why I stand on the Bible, because God's word does not change. Individual people matter, each is sacred to God, no matter their intelligence, their productive worth to society. Each person is created by God and is divinely appointed to be here. We are not to make decisions on God's behalf on who should live and who should die based on utilitarian principles on ability to look after the baby after it is born or the fact that it might be completely unwanted. For this it is difficult for the prospective mother however with love, children can be given a second chance in another family. God is loving, he does not desire his judgement fall on any of His people. How do we know this? Because through him was Jesus born, the most loving person on earth. Loving because he brought the truth to everyone in the most loving way possible, through healing and deliverance. He spoke to both men and women, he didn't discriminate. He loved everyone however he also expected purity and holiness. He does not take us as we are but loves us to repentance.

What about marriage? In another generation it was taken for granted that marriage was for life. Marriage is a an indissolvable union. Before this personally affected me, I would admittedly pray for marriages that were in their third round of partnership. Now I know different, this is living adultery. There is nothing sacred about such a union! This is not marriage at all! In this modern times we 'tolerate' this. We say well why should one be unhappy in a union which does not suit us anymore? People change, people move on. But God does not. His word stands clear. Can you see how much destruction has been caused to the family unit from easy divorces? A man or woman can easily say goodbye with little thought of the consequences on the children. Many justifications can be given, would their children want their parents to be happy? Live without conflict? Well the truth is that a family needs both the mother and father to be present. Even if not completely involved in all aspects of family life. I have witnessed families breaking apart and I truly cannot understand why. I have heard excuses such as that they no longer understand the person, they no longer get along or communicate and I think this is weak. People come into marriage as damaged people, or even slightly broken, the real work begins years into the marriage where they are there because of the commitment rather then feelings of love and affection as these have diminished especially with the addition of children and pets and responsibilities outside the family home.

It is not for us or myself to judge on people who leave, they have their reasons, if deep in their heart they know they did the wrong thing then I hope they seek repentance and seek return of their spouse. In saying that, I believe that if one should leave for reasons of safety than one should remain single and not hold someone else in the wings whose arms are warm to fall into if the relationship falters. This of course is immoral wicked behaviour. One should always hold oneself accountable to God which means staying single and unmarried for the period of separation. For myself, this season has been one of self-reflection but I have looked to God and He has not failed. He has been good. I am not seeking another partner. I also wish my children to follow my lead in their future relationships. That we don't give up but also choose Godly partners who will support them through thick and thin, in good times and difficult times.

I think how can I live without someone to support me, to be my ballast and my rock however God has been there for me. And even though I would like such a person in flesh, sometimes that is not Gods will for us. We can choose fear or we can choose God. God is my unfailing supply in times of need, if we know God is full of love and will be with us through all storms that may come than why should we desire more? God knows our hearts and when we pray we show our faith in Gods will for us, that He is indeed a personal loving God, in prayer we are showing our thanks to Him, for what good is it if we are given presents that we did not ask for? How much more sweet when we are given our hearts desire we have asked our loving Father for? How few people I know think the way I do, and yet there are some unfailing souls. To know right from wrong and yet not hold people in judgement but in compassion and unfailing love, but to be uncompromising in one's values and morals, to hold God in highest esteem above all hierarchies and superstructures.

Thursday, 5 September 2013

What if everything is really okay?

We spend our lives so consumed by anxiety about what could happen or how you would deal with such a such scenario. What if everything is okay. I mean really okay because Jesus lives and God is captain of the ship. Imagine being a baby in a car. The driver takes this turn and that turn. The baby sleeps. A bus honks it horn, another car takes our spot in traffic but still the baby sleeps. I'm not saying that we should go through life asleep. But the baby knows Mum is in charge and Mum knows how to drive a car. Nothing disturbs that baby. The baby does not think 'Oh no that bus is coming too close or Oh no that car is being rude what if the driver gets out and yells something...'

This thought just popped into my head because I'm always worried. But really fear is just another idol. We consume ourselves with fear and anxiety rather then God.

Here's another thought 'What if God really knows what we would like and what's best for us?'

What is holding us back from giving our lives fully to God? My main thought goes like this 'If I were to listen totally to God I wouldn't be able to do the things I want to do. I might have to do things I don't like and not do all the things I want to complete.'

What if God has a plan for you that is so much better than what you could ever imagine that you are actually holding yourself back from your full 'God-potential' by rebelling against Him in everything? Thinking that you know what is right for you is a form of pride. Plain and simple. We are such prideful creatures. Pride is insidious because it is so well hidden by performing so well in all aspects that society holds important. Such as good schooling, good looks, good clothes, good deportment. Basically making ourselves magazine perfect. But God doesn't care about those things. Those things let us conform to our community better and give us better status so that people perhaps listen to us more and take us more seriously however, these things will not bring us closer to God.

Looking to God for answers.

Sometimes we look everywhere but to God for answers. We look to astrology, psychics, mediums... all sorts of abominations in the eyes of the Lord. If you have been doing this please ask for forgiveness, I have been guilty too. We forget however, to look for Him who no answer is too small or big. He knows everything. If something is troubling you, there is some mystery in your life that remains unsolved or even there is something you have lost, before you consult dubious people, please ask God first. He will tell you when the time is right. If there is trouble in your relationship with someone. Ask God to give you peace about it and to repair it or to provide you with insight so that you can come to peace within yourself.

God loves you and wants the best for you. God is the only way. Life is meaningless without God and eternity of being. God can guide you but you must listen. Lets see if we can take the leap of faith and start listening to God and less to ourselves.

Saturday, 24 August 2013

The Politics of God

We're coming up to a Federal Election in Australia and I just had a thought... if both our main contenders are Christian then why is there even a competition? They should be gracious to each other. Everyone wins if God wins. If they both truly follow God then there is nothing to choose from however of course it is not that simple. First... are they both Jesus lovers?... will they say out loud in front of all the world to hear and see that they love Jesus and say that Jesus is their master and saviour. I think not. This saddens me. Are they Christian just for the Christian voters but play it down when they try and get other religions and atheists to vote for them?

God is our only leader. No-one else. This fact should give us absolute peace and certainty in the future. If God exists now and forever what is there to fear? Only satan's deception. Satan cannot harm us if we do not give him our obedience - if we resist his lies and temptations.

Give our vote for God everyday and then politics doesn't matter.

Monday, 4 April 2011

Taking the hard road

Our life is but a vapour but we pursue comfort and easy living but in a thousand years will it matter how comfortable your life was? I find this really hard to think of. I mean it's not to say that comfort is bad it's just to say it should not be pursued in it's own right. We are to pursue Jesus not other things - mere distractions to Him. It's not about having less or living more simply for it's own sake and more about focusing on what's important.

Tuesday, 1 March 2011


Heavenly Castle

Pretend you might that you can know
the fulfilment of His Glory
Pretend you might that you might know
the true wonderment of His majesty
But none can pretend to be closer to Him or higher than others who are also of his creation
For to Him we are but clay castings
And without Him we are doomed.

So build you earthly castles here and now
Build your dreams your desires too
Construct with stone and surround with moat
Make them splendid and admirable
So that you may be known for your greatness.

But our earthly visions are sunk from the very start
For tainted by sin we cannot grasp
Until Eternity's blast
That goodness is beyond us

For until we realise that Christ has built for us a throne
We can but wait till Heaven's castle is our own.

by Sophie K